Friday sitting in the philosophy commons room on the third floor of dodd; attending the Q&A about applying to philosophy grad school.
"it's definitely not something you want to go into by default..."
I wonder how much of life we live just by default.
moving along a chain of causation without questioning,
and so one thing leads to another
in the end you seem to be merely a passive participant in your life...
no longer an agent of action,
just 'going with the flow'.
I went to college because that's what you were suppose to do after highschool
I'll go to grad school because that's what you do when you major in philosophy
I'll become a professor in an unfulfilling school (I'm not smart enough to teach anywhere else) because that's what you do after earning a phd
I'll get married and have a couple of children, looking for the fulfillment that my job doesn't give me, because that's what women do, even professionals
and so the causal chain continues...
I am on the outside, looking helplessly on as my life spreads before me;
as the doors of opportunity shut behind me- each decision I make further solidifies my determined future.
But perhaps i'm melodramatic: at any given point i can intervene and move in a new direction...
with a new cookie cutter life stretching before me.
It might be a different cage you create, but it's a trap no less.
Some of my Mormon friends from highschool are getting married at the young age of 20.
Initially it completely baffled me...
the apathy with which they looked on the almost fascist pre-packaged life their church decreed for them since birth.
I was shocked by the absence of concern with which they made a step that would cement the path of the rest of their existence. Isn't it terrifying to see your entire life spread rigidly before you?
it's odd that i can now answer that question: i realize that there really isn't that much difference between my life and thiers.
